Your partner not only has to choose to be with, but also to choose to stay with you every day. So naturally some people worry about this thought and wonder, “How can I make him stay and make sure he will not leave me?” If this is the question you often ask, you may not be enough mature for full and healthy relationships. People who try to close their partner in a cage do not realize that they are sabotaging their relationship in this way because it is freedom and distance that create a desire for closeness and attraction. If you want to know more about us, find us today at marriage counselling in toronto.
To your attention, here 6 ways in which we unconsciously sabotage our relationships:
You try to separate him from his friends.
There is nothing wrong with your boyfriend coming out with friends from time to time, don’t you like to hang out with friends too? When he is not at home, you do not have to stay and wait for him, there are so many exciting things you can do without him, enjoy your time! Even if you can isolate yourself from them, think about whether this will bring positives to your relationship? At first you may feel comfortable, but it will quickly become annoying and no wonder he wants to leave the relationship under the pretext that he needs space.
Complain that he works too much, rather than supporting him in his successes.
Often the motivation of men comes from the fact that they want to provide us with a better life, precisely because of this they stay late at work and work on weekends. If you dislike this, instead of supporting it, it will feel invaluable. There are two outcomes of this situation, he will either lose his motivation and start lying on the couch or find one that will support and admire him.
Allows a bad behavior towards his family.
Remember well, even if you hear complaints about him about his mother’s or his father’s behavior, you have to keep your best behavior, listen to him, but you must not allow yourself to say bad words about his parents. He will quickly forget the enmity with them, but he will remember the insults you have said. Your partner’s parents have given him life, and you have to love and honor them just for that.
You treat all women around him as a threat.
If every time you communicate with another woman you make him explain and jealous, he will soon feel controlled and will know that you do not trust him. And if you really do not trust him, it means you have a problem far more serious than ordinary jealousy. Among other things, jealousy means low self-esteem and that you do not believe in your own worth.
You become totally dependent on him.
There is no bigger killer than the one that depends 100% on you. Your partner wants to have a woman, not a dependent child, who does not take responsibility for her life. How much he wants you depends on your ability to maintain independence and control over your life.
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